sophomore year is officially over. i remember being so sad at the end of my freshman year--it felt like the summer was forever and things would never be the same. i suppose the latter was true...you can never quite relive the first year of college. this year, i just wanted it all to end. the important people in my life here whom i've still kept contact with during this insane year will still be important three months from now. i know who truly matters now~ survival of the fittest friends =) i only hope i've been there for them too.

deb, mar, and san came down here to take me out for a thai dinner last night. it gave me a taste of summer weekends back in fremont. =) i'm looking forward to a heavenly, drama-free (i hope) three months in my beloved, boring suburb. my life needs to downshift for a while so i can remember all the stupid little things that i love about living. i don't want to see the world flying by behind my window as i hurtle along whatever road i've convinced myself to follow anymore; i want to lie in the grass, breathe fresh air, and be content for a little while.

sorry, just feeling a bit relieved, reflective, tranquil...doesn't make for the most interesting blogging, but i wanted someplace to spread my thoughts. goodnight.

* * *
standing in the doorway of my life in this house
trying to find a way to get out
looking for a sign that i should open the door
this craziness is getting me down

but today is the day we break free
today is the day we break free

walking down the stairway to the traffic below
anything could happen, i know
hey but i'm sick of everybody telling me what to do
i hear you, hey, but i already know

'cause today is the day we break free
today is the day we break free

it's clear in my mind after all of this time
what i feel, my love
there are so many times that the sun doesn't shine
but i'm here, my love

and today is the day

maybe i should wait just a minute or two
it's getting cold now, i feel so insecure

the future is a mistress that is so hard to please
and the past is a pebble in my shoe