i try so hard to stay grounded, face reality--makes it a bigger slap in the face when i realize my little shreds of optimism have slowly been lifting me up only to have something slam me back into the dirt.

plan: share all optimism with others and keep all pessimism for myself.

yeah, i'm fucking incurable. ugh.

i need to keep 'em low. cuz really, it's all been on me.