i miss not having to use those paper seat covers when i go to the bathroom.

i don't feel like blogging about what i do anymore. so i'll do that when i feel like it. i've been sleeping too little, but luckily i've somehow been staying awake in all my lectures. it's incredible...last quarter i think i fell asleep in every lecture i went to. all of a sudden cell biology and developmental biology and molecular orbitals are interesting...hm. maybe it's because i have really good snack food in my room these days...those little asian crackers, tomato pretz, pirate's booty, pringles, cookies...wow. i never had good food last quarter...or even last year!

why am i blogging at 2:45 am when i have a chinese quiz to study for and an inquiry of study to write? well...i'm getting to those. really. just need to gather my wits about me. i wore one of my favorite new-ish shirts today...the forever 21 shirt that cher liked =) felt like it went to waste though. some people need to copy phone numbers down correctly. i'm in weird, dry, random mode. i throw in a couple smilies here and there because otherwise i frighten myself with my non-smileyness. i like smiles. writing the word "smile" so often has robbed the word of all meaning. it looks like gibberish to me now. so many girls i know are guy-hating right now...i can feel it suffocating my hope. maybe it's all for the better? but i want that anomaly. i want that like-whoa. actually, i want them rather distantly right now...i'm feeling very removed these days. i wish something would lift my emotions up so i know they still exist. maybe it's just the late night talking.

i'm going to go listen to slow music and do work now.

* * *
I’m No Angel ~Dido Armstrong

If you gave me just a coin for every time we say goodbye
Well I’d be rich beyond my dreams, I’m sorry for my weary life
I know I’m not perfect but I can smile
And I hope that you see this heart behind my tired eyes

If you tell me that I can’t, I will, I will, I’ll try all night
And if I say I’m coming home, I’ll probably be out all night
I know I can be afraid but I’m alive
And I hope that you trust this heart behind my tired eyes

I’m no angel, but please don’t think that I won’t try and try
I’m no angel, but does that mean that I can’t live my life?
I’m no angel, but please don’t think that I can’t cry
I’m no angel, but does that mean that I won’t fly?

I know I’m not around each night
And I know I always think I’m right
I can believe that you might look around

I’m no angel, but please don’t think that I won’t try and try
I’m no angel, but does that mean that I can’t live my life?
I’m no angel, but please don’t think that I can’t cry
I’m no angel, but does that mean that I won’t fly?