driving around at night by myself is rather fun. with a very delicate tweak of the volume dial in my car, i can occasionally get both sides of the car radio speakers working. how sweet is that? plus i can sing along as loudly as i want to without any snide comments. except maybe from passing drivers who think i'm talking to myself. well screw you!

then some classic old 80s song comes on the radio and i have to smile. tonight's song for me was OMD's "if you leave" =) i just got this big ol' smile on my face...reminds of me of my childhood K101 days in my mom's car. soft rock in the 80s/early 90s, baby! i miss those days when i didn't know what any of those love song lyrics meant. haha. and did you know OMD stands for orchestral manoeuvres in the dark? what a wonderfully pompous name ;) 80s male singers had great slightly-ambiguously-gay-sounding voices too.

and ever notice how the police's "every breath you take" has the scariest stalker lyrics ever? "every breath you take / every move you make / every bond you break / every step you take / i'll be watching you," "oh can't you see? / you belong to me," and "i dream at night i can only see your face...i keep crying, baby, please"? good lord, stay away, sting!

in any case, i think our kids should be raised listening to soft rock like amanda and i were. sure you may grow up with absurd ideas about love and crap, but these days most kids are into hip hop and rap about objectifying women and r. kelly pretending he's from "the streets" when just a couple years ago he was singing about how high he can fly and we had no idea he had pedophilic tendencies. plus every other word is bleeped out on the radio: "last *bleep*in' night i *bleep*in' *bleep*ed tha motha*bleep*in *bleep* *bleep* *bleep*. then brandon goes and downloads the song except it's the uncut version and i have to start yelling, "WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO, BRANDON?!" ugh. too much mtv too. i might find "doggy shizzle televizzle" (whatever the hell that is) to be funny, but my little brother shouldn't watch it! damned mtv. i didn't have mtv when i was 11. i didn't have cable when i was 11. i didn't have a computer when i was 11.

my god, i sound old. maybe it's time to tell my little brother about how i had to walk barefoot 10 miles to school uphill both ways in gopher-sized hail and the only toys we had were fishballs when i was his age...

-
people annoy me sometimes. the only person allowed to be temperamental is ME, got it? psh.

i wonder how well you can ever know someone. it would be pretty cool to be able to see everyone's underlying motives...or maybe it would only be horribly depressing.

* * *
"If You Leave" -OMD

if you leave, don't leave now
please don't take my heart away
promise me just one more night
then we'll go our separate ways
with hours left time on our sides
now it's fading fast
every second every moment
we've got to--we've gotta make it last

i touch you once, i touch you twice
i won't let go at any price
i need you now like i needed you then
you always said we'd still be friends someday

if you leave i won't cry
i won't waste one single day
but if you leave don't look back
i'll be running the other way
seven years went under the bridge
like time was standing still
heaven knows what happens now
you've got to--you've gotta say you will

i touch you once, i touch you twice
i won't let go at any price
i need you now like i needed you then
you always said we'd meet again

i touch you once, i touch you twice
i won't let go at any price
i need you now like i needed you then
you always said we'd still be friends

i touch you once, i touch you twice
i won't let go at any price
i need you now like i needed you then
you always said we'd meet again someday

if you leave
oh if you leave
oh if you leave
don't look back
don't look back