Lesson learned

In my sporadic quest to improve myself and my health, I recently purchased liquid egg whites from my second favorite store in the world, Trader Joe's. (I'm sorry, TJ, but until you start selling ridiculously cheap and cute clothing too, you'll always be the Jan to Target's Marcia.)

On my drive home from work today, I imagined throwing together the leftover ingredients from my pizza fritta experiment and making a lovely omelet of 4 cheeses, prosciutto, tomatoes, basil, red pepper flakes, garlic, and onions. How delicious! How fun! And how healthy it will be when I replace the whole cholesterol-laden eggs with liquid egg whites! And when I started preparing all the ingredients in my kitchen, I did it with a carefree, anticipatory smile. :)!!

Except I had to downgrade my aspirations from omelet to scramble when I realized I had a lot of ingredients and a very small skillet. Sure! Still happy!

I unscrewed the carton of liquid eggs (my instincts screaming about how unnatural this was), poured some in, and started scrambling. Ooh, look at the whites coalescing and cooking! Scramble, scramble...look at them becoming pink from the tomato juices! Look at them...curdling?

Result:

A delicious Italian-flavored mess that looks reminiscent of vomit.

Maybe I need to practice cooking more with egg whites. Perhaps. Possibly. I just ate it with my eyes closed.

And now we know, children: whites are not always better. I need the yellows too. Who knew this post would become so profound and racist?