so finals are coming next week. that ain't cool. probably shouldn't have gone up to berkeley last night with my sisters last night to party, but i had to try being a good big sis again! party was okay. jungle juice is colorful. boo the dog was so cute! learned how to play caps afterward at jason's--i wasn't half bad for a beginner after the initial blind cap-hurl. but beer? ew. =P oh well, i'm a trooper.

we drove up to berkeley after a nice kdphi study break =) actually, i should probably feel a little guilty because i didn't have much studying done to break from. anyway, we baked cookies and saw slideshows and ate and talked and laughed and took pictures (of course) and did a lot of "sisterhooding", as the ghetto cathy phrased it. it was so lovely to see everyone. love you all <3

revelation: michelle tells me i am "the christian-boy-type." i am not christian. and within this obvious conflict of interest may lie the reason why i have not been in a relationship in many years! sweet. =P

once again, finals are coming. i am scared. bye.

i dreamed of you today. it was the first dream of you in which we all knew you were gone--but you weren't. we made plans to visit china and you talked to travel agents and we found the village we came from. i never let anyone touch you in my dream...you were a ghost and i was afraid if anyone tried, you would leave.

in the end, when we were walking by the river with our family laughing behind us, i took your arm, and it was so warm and solid. you were with us the whole time, but i told you, "i've missed you." then you cried with me.

you left as tears fell when i woke. i miss you so much. 11.1.99.